For all my German/English speaking friends:

Kiddo (handing me something): You can behold that.

I am so so so shooting myself !!

;-(

What is it with kiddo?
Shortly before bedtime (which is 10 pm) he runs into the living room.
Doing an Elvis, then a Chuck Norris with the shadows on the wall,then throws himself next to me "Hey Mom, what's up?", then goes into a rendition of some 80's song, then steps on the balcony and throws his arms up in the air "Ahhhhhh, what beautiful air!", then dares me to a boxing match and then says "Ok, gotta go to bed. Good night!"
Uhm .......

Now these are the conversations I can't stand - especially not before 7 am.
Kiddo: Are you going down to the basement today?
Me: The basement? What would I do there? Why would I go there?
Kiddo: So, you are not going.
Me: Give me a good reason why I would go there and tell me why you are asking.
Kiddo: I have school until late and then I immediately need to get to rowing.
Me: And that has WHAT exactly to do with me going down to the basement?
Kiddo: If you are going down there you could drop my gym bag next to my bike in the basement and I wouldn't have to walk up to get it but could go straight to rowing.
Me: See? THAT makes sense to me. A simple reason. And why not just ask me if I would mind dropping the bag down there at some point during the day?
Kiddo: So you are going down to the basement?
Me: GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

"Do you say the door close good-bye"

That was what kiddo just said to me on his way out.
I will just assume that he really wanted to say:
"Will you say good-bye and close the door?"

Otherwise I would have to shoot myself ;-(

Kiddo, apparently in a heat frenzy, just took to defrost our little fridge freezer.
Strolls over, asks me some trivial stuff and then sticks a handful of chopped ice down my shirt, laughs his butt off ....

Yep, I _do_ love him. Seriously.

Kiddo just got home. First thing out of his mouth:
"Are you nuts!!???"
Me: "I love you, too."
Kiddo: "You are cooking!"
Me: "Hmmm, like I do basically every evening."
Kiddo:"It's hot and you turn the stove on!!??"
Me: "Wanna eat something or not?!"
Kiddo: "Yes, but, damn it's hot!"

He didn't even ask what's for dinner. Just pushed me aside to get the best position in front of the fan *lol*

Kiddo chose "ethics" instead of "religion" at school. Much to my delight. Same time slot. Ethics was cancelled and the religion class went to see an undertaker whereas the ethic-kids had 2 hours off. Now, just a thought .... why not take the ethic kids along ??? Then ... they had Freud in another class. Conditioning. I asked about Pawlow. WHO ? Johari? WHAT ? I went down the list, normal psychology stuff. HUH?? Frightening, our school system.......